You are correct, with God all things are possible. I am positive that one day you will find that strength in yourself, with the assistance of God.

Howdy Paulpez78,

I realize you are giving me encouragement, and I appreciate that a lot.
I can't agree with the approach of finding strength in myself. Relying on myself, instead of God, never worked. I'll never have the strength in myself to overcome anything.
When I rely on God, though, He gives me the strength for anything. The amazing thing is, when I rely on Him, I find I don't think about looking at porn, or that it just doesn't appeal to me.
I've wondered why God doesn't fix me so I just don't have these desires anymore. I think it's because if He did, I'd still be sinful, and I'd just find another sin to rely on. If I rely on Him, though, I'm relying on an unchangable God who will always be my "ever present help in times of trouble".

Handling the relapse is quite difficult. Have faith that you are able to find the strength within yourself to overcome the relapse. It is a hard situation to deal with.

I just went to the url you were talking about it has great info thank you God bless

What's up JessIam

It's not you the Holy Ghost is convicting me, when I read your post yesterday I got convicted. I recently put a porn filter on my computer or activated it, but I can't get to this forum with the filter on, and I really need this forum. So just keep praying and encouraging me. I relapsed today and I was testing out the porn filter on the internet. I'm trying pray for me.

God bless
Malcolm

[quote="gotjesus8"]I ain't making no excuses just keep praying for me I will be alright
thank you JessIam. I relapsed today also on da internet. I'm hot like the 4th of July

God bless all y'all[/quote]
Howdy GotJesus8,

I hope it didn't come across that I thought you were excusing anything. My comment isn't directed towards anyone. I just see what may be an unhealthy pattern that contributes to people continuing in sin.

My recovery has always deepened from relapses, but only when I've gone to God and asked what He wants to teach me through the relapse. A relapse means I haven't dealt with something in my soul. When I relapse, I pray that God shows me everything He wants me to see.

I'm also concerned that people are focusing almost totally on the sin. Sinning is the expression of a heart that is disconnected from God at some level. If I focus on the sin when I relapse, I'm just going to keep relapsing. If I focus on God, and reconnecting with Him, He'll protect me from sinning.

Hope that makes sense.

God Bless,

Jess

I ain't making no excuses just keep praying for me I will be alright
thank you JessIam. I relapsed today also on da internet. I'm hot like the 4th of July

God bless all y'all

I hear people talking about relapsing, but nobody seems to be trying to learn from them. Relapse is an oportunity for God to teach us about ourselves so we can work on our connection with Him.

Please read this blog to understand what I mean (just cut and paste the url into your browser:
http://www.shelleylubben.com/forum/viewtopic.php?id=1008

I relapsed yesterday pray for me

well keep u in prayer littlestone!

i mess up i did repent i dont want to do it anymorre please pray

Hang in there guys. I really appreciate you guys alot.

Thanks 4 the words of encouragement. I needed them.
God Bless
Malcolm

Howdy GotJesus8.

God taught me a lot through my latest relapse. Remember, with God it isn't whether you've sinned or not, but if you are pursuing Him. The Bible promises He will use all things for the good of those who love Him. He can even use our sin to teach us.

God Bless You,

Jess

I relapsed tonight on the internet pray for me

thank you new creation! i agree

Good post Antonio. I agree 100% about abusing God's grace. I know that I've done more than my share of that. God is so incredibly faithful though, even when we are not, and He never ceases to amaze me. I also agree about the tough love part and that we should minister to each other not by "tickling our ears" and telling us what we "want" to hear, but what we "need" to hear, and of course by lifting each other up in prayer.

amen to that antonio, you keep your head up, and jessiam keep your head up too. men need sex, so it's a struggle, but we can do all things through Christ which stregnthens us. We're visual creatures so we have to be extra careful what we put before our eyes, and what we look at. On the internet, on the street, sad to say even in the church. God bless I'm out.

Hello Jess, I relapsed last week. I had been 3 months with no sex/masturbation and enduring temptation...and then last week, i felt the temptation gradually coming on as usual and instead of getting up and praying, I laid there meditated on it and gave in. It was in me to fight but I didnt. We have to use our God given power no matter what it feels like...people we dont even know yet are depending on us to stay strong. I didnt beat myself up and go into some melodramatic crying frenzy, but I did give myself a pep talk: 'Antonio, do u really want to get back on that rollercoster or depression and suicidal thoughts,Antonio do you want your testimony to be devoured by the enemy, well use your power Antonio!'. Nobody is perfect, and we all mess up...but there can come a time to where we abuse the grace of God despite knowing the consequences. I'm back up again and my resolve is stronger to stay outta the mess. Lets keep each other lifted up and prayer but also to know that tough love is in order too..because if we stay willfullly bound how is God going to use us to help someone? God bless, lets keep our heads up, brush it off, and move on

Thanks again Phoenix, keep your head up JessIam

I love you guys. Let love flow let healing flow and even let the tears flow, it's ok really! When I cried it released so much tension and pain, but it hurt in a good way for once, and then I slept like a baby. Seriously guys. it does wonders.

some guys say, crying is a sign of weakness. but then tell me this who is stronger, a man who stifles his tears and the stress causes ulcers, or the man who can show his vulnerability and also rests his soul. it takes much more strength to knowingly trust God enough to open yourself up and show some vulnerablilty. Jesus wept, He cried because of the lack of faith of his people. Also, Isa 66:2 For all those things hath mine hand made, and all those things have been, saith the LORD: but to this man will I look, even to him that is poor and of a contrite spirit, and trembleth at my word.

Brokenness is a characteristic that God looks for. it helps us yield and when we yield to God that is when we overcome things.

I love you guys. Hang in there. God is gong to bless you so much.

What's up JessIam?
God will heal your pain. Stay on the forum. I relapsed a little bit yesterday, not too much, but if I do I got this forum to heal and other men to talk to or correspond with, look at Shelley, if God can do it for her, He can do it for you. This is what's keeping me from really going off the deep end with internet porn. Thanks for the words of encouragement Phoenix.

Howdy LJPhoenix,

No argument there. I'm not holding back the pain, I'm just hurting.

I know we are all guys in here, but I have something you might think about. When I first started coming to the forums and started my recovery, it hurt alot, but the thing God di for me that helped me the most was He sat down in front of me and held my hands and looked into my eyes, This is how it felt anyway, and He told me that He would be by my side the whole time I was walking through this trial, but when the pain was at its worst, He would hold me and cry with me. He taught me that it is better to let the pain flow through instead of trying to force the pain to go away, so with His help I embraced the pain and let it flow and I weeped alot. the tears felt good because what caused my pain was not the porn but abuse from a while back. I was using the porn to cover the pain and make time go by faster. God carried me through my pain. Let Him carry you through yours.

Take both of God's hands and let Him look deep into your soul and let Him heal your heart, He will help you heal your past, even things you might not remember right now. Let His love flow.

I am so proud of you guys. you are awesome. Jesus loves you so much!!

Howdy GotJesus8,

Thanks for asking. I'm getting better. God and I are working on the shame thing, which is what triggered the relapse. I'm glad God's improving me, but I sure wish it didn't hurt so sometimes.

How are you doing?

Jess

What's up JessIam? How r u doing? Keep your head up. ThanksLjphoenix.

Thanks gotJesus8 and LJPhoenix.

We love you all so much. Always remember that! You are each so very precious to us. We are here for you and we do pray for you often. God will never ever give up on you.

Love in Christ,

LJ Phoenix

These forums are helping me a whole lot. keep being honest and sincere. This is the place for deliverance and healing.

Thanks Danyl,

It totally makes sense: I act out when I'm stressed, and the more I stress myself out over a relapse, the more I perpetuate the relapse.

Psalm 37:8 puts it like this:
Do not fret; it leads only to evildoing

I don't give relapses a second thought. If I relapse oh well. I have found that the more I try to make myself stop the harder it is to actually stop. It seems the more I try to tell myself how porn is a no no and I must stop, each day I do this the more each day it seems to build until I break. Sometimes it lasts a day other times I have gone weeks.

I am finding now that I have stopped trying to force myself to stop that I care less and less each day about porn. There is also some teaching that I have come to realize, which I will discuss later. I have to get all my thoughts together on this before I can write about it.

Danyl