Hello my name is Mr. X and I have an addiction to porn
It is time for me to really quit the porn problem. I have been addicted to porn for as long as I have been able to get to porn. For me that has been since I was about 15 years old, so I've been addicted for 20 years now (over half my life, yikes!).
I've tried to quit a few times before but have always failed. I even joined a sex addicts annonymous club once, but dropped out.
In December I quite twice, both times for 7 days, but after the first of the year I haven't tried quitting again until now.
The funny thing is I know my life will be better without the porn. It literally wastes hours of my week every week, hours I could use to be more productive, or a better husband and father.
The other thing, my wife has no idea about my problem, and I would sort of like to keep it that way, which might make curing this addiction harder. I just don't want her to be devistated by my actions, so I sort of want to this for her, myself and my family wihtout them knowing.
Well that is it for now. I'll post more later, but I just wanted to introduce myself and start working towards porn freedom. I know it can be done, and now is the time to grow up and do it.
Thanks for your time.
Mr. X
I tried to convince my self that I could do it alone and I did for a while. I didnt want to drag her in to this, it was my problem. I got through the tough part on my own but after a while I started to change who I was. I was "doing good" but still sneaking around, I had a secret identity here on the pink cross that I was proud of and couldnt share it with the most important person in my life.
I would read the daily posts on my I-Phone in the bathroom or on the computer late at night or early in the am so no one would catch me and ask what I was looking at. I felt so good about what I was doing but I had to keep it all in, it worked for a while.
One night while taking our daily walk I just coughed it up, I guess the Holy Sprit inside me said "enough was enough". You see I felt SO GOOD I needed to get it out, I cried like a baby and she said "why didnt you tell me you had a problem, I could have helped you" WOW what a relief.
Brother you and your family have so much good coming your way it just isnt fair to keep the source from them. If you havent already I encorage you to see the film "Fireproof" it changed my life. There is a line in the film where the wife says to the husband " I want what happened to you, to happen to me" thats what its all about man!
Think about it! I applaud you in your efforts to break free from this crap. There are a lot of good people here so hit us up if we can help in any way. May God Bless you and your family on your journey!
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"A fight is not won by one punch, either learn to endure or hire a bodyguard" Bruce Lee
"to be a better husband and a better father"
We are glad to have you here. I hope that this is a place of encouragement and strength as you take steps daily to become the man that God has created you to be.
You are already on the same page as so many of us are and were when we began the journey out of porn: this sin is a bondage. the addiction is a chain that keeps us attached to the sin. So... no doubt... there is some breaking that takes place.
It is my prayer for you that you will find a purity of heart and a good conscience as we walk together. (1 Timothy 1:5)
I am going to send you a PM (private message) to cover a couple more things that will make your time here a good thing.
Remember, it is in Christ that we can do all things. He is why we do what we do here at Pink Cross. So glad you are here.
Make sure you take some of guys testimonies here. I'm sure you'll see that you are not alone.
http://www.thepinkcross.org/pinkcross-forums/prayer-requests-and-testimo...
Pastor Chadwick
Pink Cross Moderator
Hello Mr X and welcome. I too was addicted to porn for a very long time(23 years) and I tried to quit so many times I lost count.But let me encourge you to stick with it. If you need to talk PM me or any other man on this site. Don't do this alone and don't hide your true feelings. Come out and say what you feel, it's the only way we can help. I like how you said "now is the time to grow up" , we do act like babies when we look at porn! Take care brother and I hope to hear from you soon.
In Christ's Love
Doug
When I talk to high school students about sex, I'll usually ask the question:
'What's the difference between a 15 year old boy and a german shepherd?"
The answer: nothing.
They get the joke... any teenage boy, like a dog, can go around and hump everything it sees. But it takes a man to see that woman as a priceless creation with value and worth. It takes a man to say... I am going to have a relationship with her that has no strings attached.
Maybe for a lot of us who were... or are... into porn past our teen years, this illustration should be the same..
What's the difference between a 25 (35...45...55...) year old 'man', and a german shepherd... sadly, a lot of the times: not much.
Come on fellas: Time to Man-up and Grow-up.
Chadwick
Pink Cross Moderator
Thank you everybody for the replies. Hopefully I get myself straightened out here. I'll keep posting as I progress.
Thanks again for the support from everyone.