Reaching Out as a Male
Wed, 02/24/2010 - 04:38
I've noticed that most of the threads that talk about how to reach sex workers are for women. As a male I was wondering what you guys advise I do. I feel called to help these people. I was thinking of going to strip clubs, getting private sessions with some of the women, and then minister to them there 1 on 1. There are also several sensual massage parlors around where I was thinking of making an appointment and then talking to the girl about Christ before anything happens. What do you guys think? Any advice would be much appreciated. Love in Christ:
Comments
I was thinking of doing something else. What about a type of online ministry? There are many sites such as adultfriendfinder and other online "hookup" sites. What about trying to minister to women on there?
Yes there are some inappropriate images but I figure it is MUCH less tempting than actually going to a strip club.
Your heart is in the right place. I talked to some Christian counsellors about "reaching out" as you put it to people in clubs etc and they suggested that I DO NOT go to these places. When people counsel others i.e. in these places, it is usually woman to woman.
I have been a Christian since aged three and a half (I'm twenty seven now). I know for a fact that I would fall back into my old habits if I went to one of these clubs, I'm too weak.
When I was water baptised at aged twenty something, I had a prophetic word that God would use me to help others in dark places and I have been. I worked in IT and encountered images walking by co-workers computers that I didn't feel comfortable seeing. I've since decided to change career.
When I work in dark places (I serve alcohol as a bar runner in festivals) I see women with tattoos etc that are explicit and these tattooed women/women in general are often not wearing much. I don't like seeing these things (my carnal side is drawn to it to be honest).I don't help people in dark places for extended periods of time,lest I be drawn back into my old lifestyle of addictions etc.
Pray about this, listen to words of wisdom that God speaks to you. If you feel that you're called to help people in strip clubs (women usually counsel women in these places), please pray about it and talked to trained Christian counsellors to find out if God has indeed called you to help people in that dark place. God will often confirm it prophetically if it is to be.
God bless you Write4Christ.
It's really best, especially in these type of ministries, for women to minister to women and men to minister to men. Even in an online ministering situation, it's very easy for women to become emotionally involved with men who are trying to help them, even if they don't see a picture of the man. It becomes very difficult for the man to help the woman in need, and in the end, it can become counter productive.
It is wonderful that you want to use your experiences to minister to others. Please let us know if you're interested in helping out with The Pink Cross.
GodzPrincess
Pink Cross Forum Admin
Of course I am! I wasn't aware that you guys needed any help. Please, send me a PM with how I can get involved.
Thank you for your interest. Please read our Mission Statement and vision as a ministry. The Pink Cross Forums reach out to many hurting people. Therefore, we need people to help who offer encouragement, good, strong Biblical advice with kindness, and much love.
Go ahead and hang out in our forums for a couple of months and post as a member and pray about it. Then, if you believe in the vision of The Pink Cross and feel led by the Lord to do so, we will share with you how to become involved.
GodzPrincess
Pink Cross Forum Admin
about Jesus as another guy wanting to justify his behavior by acting like he was doing it for God. I couldn't have received that message from a man.
One way you could serve is if a group of women are giving out gift bags on the street or in the club to go as prayer warriors and muscle. Pimps are mean and we need that protection as we minister to the girls. There is a real need for that....
Carolemarie
Moderator
Pink Cross Team Member
Dear Write for Christ~
I agree with the counsel of Precious in His Eyes and Mr. LA.
You bring up a serious issue of need. Its is a very real observation, the need within the sex industry as far as outreach is concerned. I don't want to quench you zeal, and emotional heart response. However I would not be doing you justice to if I did not bring to your attention some serious points of wisdom that should be addresses.
1. I don't know if your a family man, or perhaps a father. If that is the case what kind of educational investment at you taking to educate and equip yourself to be effective in this typo of ministry. You can be seance in your desire to help, but sincerely out of order/timing.
2. When a individual is young their is a emotional learning curve that needs to be stewed and nurtured. The learning curve is develop when male mentor-ship and role models of honor/integrity invest into the foundation of your life. These relationships will develop you beyond the immaturity of emotional thinking and give you a safe place to be open, real and here's the BIG ONE "Judge YOUR motives", for why you desire to do what you want to do.
3. As innocent and sweet as you think your desire to serve is, lets be real. Have you ever driven your car and in your peripheral vision there is a blind spot. Don't ever think you don't have a blind spot. Everyone does, and if they think they don't they are deceived, that's why relationships with healthy people are sos important, they can bring correction if your not stiff necked.
4. If you are still serious about this type of ministry, if you are not in a position to grow into a place of being confidently healthy with male accountability, consider sowing you finances or time into a local out reach or ministry where you are, even a Shelter, Juvenile Hall or Prison. It would be very wise to build up ministry equity in areas like this were there in great accountability and opportunity to develop within a ministry model.
Just alittle thought for you to consider. You can never go wrong helping and ministering to people, that's the Lord work and heart. However you can go off course by not doing things in order, wisdom, integrity and ethically. Keep your life and choices above the table, and do the right thing.
A friend,
Mrs. Eden
I agree that this would be challenging ministry. Sex workers are all trauma victims in one way or another. For that reason you are working with someone who is dealing with serious traumatic stress issues and is pretty suspicious. It's unlikely that a worker hasn't heard some sort of line like the one you would use before. Not to mean that your line is necessarily manipulative but it would likely be perceived that way.
I appreciate your call to help and your wisdom in asking other people about what you might do to respond to a need. There are many ways in which you might involve yourself in this ministry that might not be a frontline job.
Eric
I think generally speaking, it is better for women to minister to women, particularly in the environment of the sex industry, including strip clubs. The temptation is very strong for men to fall. I know Harmony Dust, of Treasures Ministry, has a team of women who go to each strip club in the area to give out gift bags for the women who strip. In the process they do reach out to the club owners and other staff, oftentimes males, in order to let them know their motives are good, etc. And that God loves them, too.
I would like to see more men reach out to the men who are involved in the sex industry, from club owners of strip clubs, workers, patrons, pimps, pornographers, customers of porn and prostitution...the focus is so often on the females, not as much on the males. I do think there has been more reaching out to the males, but don't know of any ministries that are set up and geared specifically towards males who are part the sex industry in some form. Most ministries involving focus towards men are addressing their struggle with porn addictions or other sexual issues, not so much focusing on outreaches to pimps and club owners and such-- the "perpetrators".
Men can relate to men struggling with sexual addictions/
strongholds and temptations, and can share the love of God to men who are looking for love and value and worth in the worst places. Satan has really sought to destroy so many men by pulling them away from the love of God and toward the sensual passions of this world. God wants His beloved men back to Him!
Pray and seek God. Ask Him what He would like for you to do. You have a desire to do something related to the sex industry, and I do believe God put that desire there. Ask Him to reveal something more specific to your calling He has given you. Keep seeking Him until He makes it more clear to you where He desires you to be.
Blessings,
Tonya
"Do not fear, for I have redeemed you; I have called you by name, you are Mine!...I am the Lord, your God, the Holy One of Israel, your Savior;...You are precious and honored in my eyes, and I love you...do not be afraid, for I am with you." (Is.43:4-5)