Tamra Toryn Out of Porn!
Ex Porn Star Tamra Toryn
I am VERY excited to announce that another porn star has left porn! Tamra contacted me through Myspace and we immediately connected. She wanted to come out with her story to help educate young girls before they get into porn and suffer major consequences. She also wants those viewing porn to know the truth so they will stop buying into the lie and contributing to women being abused in the industry. She is very outspoken and tells it like it is in an interview with her and I. Talk about two outspoken ex porn stars! Click here to listen to an audio of us talking boldly about the truth behind the porn industry and more!
She boldly writes on her myspace blog:
"Unlike most girls that start their porn careers doing just masturbation, oral or girl/ girl, I went straight for hardcore because I was quote unquote "hardcore" . Attitude check anyone? My scene was shot Gonzo (reality/amateur style) boy/girl, anal, ATM (ass to mouth)- pay $1000. Expenses and flight all paid. Sounded like a dream come true.
I arrive and a man with a sign awaits me in the baggage claim area with an Escalade limo to pick me up. We stop at Denny's to eat and meet with the director. After we meet, he takes me outside to give me a once over look of approval, we finish eating, and drive to the studio.
Nothing prepared me other than a boot camp workout, my xanax prescription for my anxiety disorder since I was nervous as heck, and a low carb diet for a month to dig up the courage to take my clothes off to do things I never thought I would share on film for the world to see. Tons of people walking around, food provided, etc etc. No STD tests were given or shown since the director assured me that since they were using condoms, I wouldn't have to worry. (Yeah right)
2 hours later, naked, medicated, sore, and wet from jumping off a boat to end the scene like they pushed me off the boat like a useless stupid whore, I received $1000 for my "hard work", praised of a "great job" I did and driven to my friend's house (since I didn't want to stay at the production's beach house with weird people on drugs I didn't know) and extended my stay to celebrate my new life as a "porn star".
This is where real life ended and the delusion of temporary existence began."
You can read the rest of her amazing story at www.myspace.com/miss_Tammie_B Her profile is set to private but if you request to be her friend and mention Pink Cross she will approve you. Please be sure to leave her encouraging comments. She says many myspace friends already reached out to her and it REALLY touched her.
Tamra entered the porn industry at age 26 in 2005 and was involved in making very hardcore movies. After being tired of the abuse and catching HPV, a sexually transmitted disease, she left the porn industry in February, 2008 and now works at a tanning salon in Hollywood. Her dream is to go to Cosmetology school so we are going to do our best to help her make that dream come true. Right now she has a need for new clothes so we want to help her with immediate needs first.
If you have a heart to help Tamra rebuild her life, please donate below. We appreciate everyone who cares about these precious women who are trying to rebuild their lives. It's NOT an easy time for Tamra so we thank you for caring. She struggles with many consequences of porn and Pink Cross Foundation wants to be there for her.
Check back for an updated blog about our meeting on Monday. I am driving down to Hollywood to take her out to lunch and shopping for new clothes. I can't wait to spend time with her!
Thank you sincerely for caring about precious women like Tamra. We couldn't do it with your help!
Love, Shelley Lubben
President, Pink Cross Foundation
You may donate securely online at:
UPDATE: Tamra and I went shopping in Los Angeles and had a blast! I was able to buy her a couple really nice outfits and a few other things thanks to those of you who donated. I am so thankful you cared about Tamra and she says a HUGE thank you to all of you!
She can't believe how many people care, especially all the people on myspace encouraging her and loving her. She is so thankful for all of your love and support.
Our day together was filled with talking, shopping, laughing, and sharing our stories with each other. My heart broke for some of the things she has been through that she hasn't even mentioned yet. Obviously the girls who just come out of porn need time to sort things out and aren't ready to disclose every trauma they have been through. But I am really proud of her being so strong this soon!
Tamra is very outgoing and friendly and is surprisingly very optimistic about herself and her future. She loves to encourage and counsel so I told her she should think about going to get a counseling degree. She is such a beautiful encourager with a great attitude. I was really surprised. I don't think she said one negative thing the whole time! For someone who just left porn in February and has been through some major tough times, she is definitely on her way to a very bright future!
Below are more pics of us shopping so again we thank you for supporting Pink Cross so we can continue to reach out to precious women like Tamra!
Please consider helping us to finance Tamra to come and join us at the Las Vegas AVN convention in January as we really would love to have her help us reach out to porn stars and porn fans. We will need about $500 to pay for her flight out as well as her meals and hotel costs.
Thanks for caring!
Shelley and Tamra shopping!
Tamra loves her new clothes!
- Shelley Lubben's blog
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more and more girls are leaving this industry because of you shelley!i hope she's allright now!GOD bless you Tamra!!!
Now she can testify, my brothers and sisters, that she is HARDCORE truly for getting out of this. I find it awesome that someone can devote SO MUCH of there lives to this stuff, get lost in it, and not find a way out. I can see how amazing it to get out before you think you've hit a rock bottom. God is good! Amen!
God bless you both!! it's wonderful to see that more and more people leave the industry because of Shelley's work.
Congrats on your NEW Life!
--------------------------------
I forgive everything and everyone
who could possibly need
forgiveness in my past and in
my future. I am free and
they are free too. Things are
cleared up between us now and forever.
And he has said: YOU WILL NOT HURT MY DAUGHTER ANYMORE!
Storms come, & go, but the author of Life is able to control of even the most wicked tempests that move to & fro. When the storms come against you, he is your shelter & your strength. You are his girl Tamra, & he is your father in Heaven. Its going to be exciting to find out what he has in store for you. Your future is bright, so follow that light! I leave you with wisdom from Yolanda Adams' Through the Storm (circa 1990)
I am not afraid
Of the stormy winds nor the waves
& though the tides become high
He holds me while I ride
I've found safety in the Masters arms
While riding through the storm.
______________________________________________
Much Love to you, & God Bless, ~Dan
For me, the core of Jesus' ministry was about meeting the people whom society shunned and excluded, where they were, AND then making a difference in their lives.
This seems pretty much exactly what you're doing at the Pink Cross Foundation, and the fruit is clear. Just look at the photo and that smile. Happy, relaxed, free. Can't wish for much more.
I heard that Tamra's experiences in Vegas were good too. Look forward to the reports.
Take care & God Bless.
Stuart
...and I just want you to know that right now, I am praying for you to have a mended relationship with your family, specifically your uncle. I know there is healing and restoration in the Lord. I am living proof of that.
Last week, Sunday to be exact, my children and I moved back in with my husband of 6.5 years after having been seperated for a year. I have prayed this year for a miracle (see my screen name?? :) ) that ONLY GOD could bring. I asked for open eyes on my husbands part and a soft, inviting heart on my part. In October, early November of 2008, my heart was broken for my husband. It took until December for me to tell him and another month for me to get my ducks in a row to bring our family back together but here we are! God is faithful and he DOES hear your prayers. Stay strong and lean on Him, girl! He is POWERFUL!
I am so proud of your ability to leave behind the dark life you had for a moment of time in your life. You have your whole life ahead of you and you're doing it with God! Put on your seatbelt because from now on, it's going to be an amazingly wild ride! :)
In Christ,
Andrea
Feeling hatred toward someone? Pray for them. God has a way of turning your hurt and anger toward a person into compassion.
Hopefully my uncle will come across my story online. Just knowing that my family was torn apart because of my past career still hurts me everyday. Thank you for believing in me and I'm happy for you and your family being together again :) Tamra <3
Hi Tamra,
I will be praying for healing of your family. I know all too well.
Time heals. Jesus has his timetable and we have to be patient with God and our family members who may hold things against us.
Stay in prayer and continue to focus on your new life! :)
---------------------------------
I forgive everything and everyone
who could possibly need
forgiveness in my past and in
my future. I am free and
they are free too. Things are
cleared up between us now and forever.
thank you ms tamra for making me have even stronger feelings for not viewing porn.i have to say i think its kinda sad when i was acting very strange two years ago in college from not sleeping and i told this girl how porn was messing me up and stuff and she said it normal for guys to watch porn.and i thought to myself it would change most guys attitudes if girls were much less tolerant about guys watching porn.there is this friend i have and i if and when i see her again i want to be able to approach her and feel free of recent porn indulgences, like at the time two years ago i had recently decided to stop and then shortly after she came into my life.i recently gave up and watched some porn today after five weeks and i really did feel disgusted.so let me say again thank you for waking me up to these so called fantasy i am working on deleting from my mind and body.like you were saying its just this addiction i have and like the others i gave up i picked up this one again and used this as my new drug.but i think it was some what i good thing i gave up because hopefully now i will be able to not watch or think about it as much for five months instead od five weeks.didnt exactly mean to write so much personal things on this blog entry
Hi Tamra.
Don't worry, all of us humans are a "mess". And to think that the Lord is only offended at sin and not the sinner!!!!
God's beauty in exchange for our ashes! That's what this is all about. What a God to know and Love!
You were created for Love but, be warned... Jesus is crazy mad for those who Love Him and He wants to shower you with a great Love that is literally supernatural and every good thing imaginable. (And if you're like me, perhaps you too have a big imagination!)
Welcome to your new life! Jesus said, "Purge your conscience from dead works so that you may now serve the living God." Your past will very soon be a faint and distant memory as you grasp the depths of Love our Lord has for you. After all, anything that is not truth is in reality, non-existent, and therefore, "as nothing". This is why this "nothing" controls your mind and life any more. You are a person of substance now because you house the very Spirit of God within your being. (Talk about substance!) And that is His choice to choose "sinful" humans to dwell in! WOW! And one day, you will say, "Was that me, Lord?" He will say, "No, Tamra, it was never the YOU that I envisioned the very moment you were conceived in your mother's womb." He breathed HIS Life into you. Now, it is your turn to EXHALE/LIVE that same Life within you. God desires for us to find great comfort in these TRUTHS.
LIVE as Loved and Blessed because you ARE. Hallelujah! Only He can take a pile of clay and make it into a beautiful vessel to be admired and used for His glory! That is "my story" as well.
BIG Love-
Marchel
I know.. we're all a mess hehe... But that's okay because only in His eyes do we appear perfect. We are His creation.
Anyway...Thank you so much for those words, Marchel. It really means a lot to me.. especially since recently I've accepted Jesus Christ back into my life. I pray to Him every night for everyone who has touched my life and helped me during my recovery to bring love and wonderful things back into all of their caring hearts and to their family and friends. I will ask Him to do the same for you :)
*hugs*
Lots of Love,
Tamra <3
Just remember... every time you look at porn, that girl on camera is being abused.... abused, prostituted on or off film, degraded, sometimes forced to lie and live in fear, and lied to about diseases that the other guy or girl is probably carrying, lied to by telling them they'll become some BIG film actress or musician which in fact Hollywood doesn't want anything to do with porn stars ... and all for a fast buck. Whether you pay for it or not, even those free sites get a profit from the internet traffic to post porn. So save your money for better things and be glad you did yourself a favor and stopped viewing it! Only the sick minded look at porn.
I forgive you.
Your Friend,
Tamra <3
You really bless me Tamra and I praise God that there is not one sin on this planet that He didn't come to snatch us out of. And I also praise Him for being a "Loser Magnet" because if that were not the case- He wouldn't have attracted me. Jesus is "The King of Woo" I like to call Him.
Here is a wonderful verse for all of us to wrap our heads around...
"The Lord said, I WILL RESTORE to you the years that the locust has eaten... you will eat in plenty and be satisfied and praise the name of the Lord your God Who has dealt wondrously with you..."
Amen, Amen and A-women! LOL
Thank you for your prayers for me. I will continue to pray for you and for God's very best in all you do. And- to use you MIGHTILY for GOOD all the days of your life. I would ask you to pray along with me that my recent and former husband, whom I still Love, be snatched out of sexual bondage SOON so that those same promises of God can become precious to his mind and soul as they are to ours.
Big Love and blessings,
Marchel
P.S. Guess what??? Now you are not only beautiful on the outside- you are beautiful on the inside too! Hhhmmm... I wonder... WHO did that???????
Hi!That's really cool what you are doing,choosing Jesus was the best thing you have done in your life...and sure you will be over quick about those years...I know because I was restored from bisexuality.God loves you so much,He will do anything to restore your life!Hugs from Italy!God bless you!
You really are a light on a hill. I know God has awesome plans for you. I will keep you in prayer on your financial needs, I understand that bit myself. I'm really encouraged by your testimony and what you've shared here you have such a strength in you and I see Gods light in you in a powerful way. Keep pressing into him, it's not easy but it's worth it.
I was into porn before I got saved and it still took God's deliverance to get me free after a while. I was "turned onto Hugh Hefner's mags when I was about 5 years old. What you say is true porn is for the sick minded and the more you watch it the sicker you get. I'm sorry for the pain I caused the women in the industry and I pray for you girls. I've watched porn destroy marriages and I'm watching it destroy my sister's marriage and their kids right now. I know I'm going to have to say something I thought about giving my sister's husband this sight.
They're Christians but incredibly deceived. I'll keep your family in prayer,"God says he puts the lonely in families" I hold on to that one as my own family is too sick for me to visit. But he has given me a church family that loves me in spite of my past in Satanism and my long string of addictions.
It's awesome that God put Shelly in your life and I pray for a strong Church with a awesome womens group support for you.
p.s. I'll support you when I can, Cheers, Brian
They threw you off a boat? That's not only horrifying it's really sad I'm so sorry!